you cant be that far away from me ; if we're looking on the same side of the moon

Friday, June 22, 2007

Great People Don't Die, They Live On In Our Memories.. Forever.

In Loving Memory of Yap Chwee Hock

1926 - 2007

There was a stark feeling of melancholy inside the room. His lifeless body laid motionless on his deathbed as I looked on intently for some form of physical response. But the austere truth was inevitable - he had passed away peacefully just minutes before I arrived. An unbridled surge of emotions overwhelmed me as the first evidence of tears started to wallow uncontrollably in my eyes. Funeral proceedings quickly beckoned following peremptory examinations by the doctor, and the solemnities were to be held on the house's very field that we grew up playing catching and football on.

They say that a funeral is the mourning of the death of a man, I choose to think of it as the celebration of a lifetime. The 5-day funeral that spanned from the 13th to the 17th of June celebrated and marked the end of the lifetime of a distinguished man, a man who lived 81 multi-faceted years, a man who once referred to me affectionately as "di yi", a man whom I call, with pride and amore, my grandfather.

An industrious and enterprising young man unfazed by the hurdles of life, my grandfather carved out a living during the Japanese Occupation by peddling the streets of Katong selling "Yeow Tiao". But the man, blessed with a keen sense of business acumen, wasn't born for a life of mediocrity and small beer. He was destined for a life of accomplishment, and his big break came in 1955 when he established YCH Transport, then a small, humble local passanger transportation business of which he was the sole proprietor for the next 18 years. In 1973, the firm was converted to a private limited enterprise and was renamed YCH Transport Pte Ltd. That laid the foundation for his firm's transformation into an end-to-end supply chain management solutions partner to world-class companies throughout Asia Pacific. Today, it is knowned as YCH Global Logistics Pte Ltd and helmed by two of my uncles and my mom.

Entrepreneurship aside, he was committed to philanthrophy and espoused the notion of giving back to society what it had given to him. Preceeding the NKF scandal, he was a regular fixture on the annual list of NKF donors, and I vaguely remember a hefty sum of 500K being donated in one particular year during my primary school years. I guess NKF had always been, for decades, his charitable organisation of choice in retrospect of the agonising loss of his third daughter, of whom I have never seen before, to kidney failure more than 20 years ago. With the NKF being the erstwhile default charitable organisation following the scandal, the Yap family, notwithstanding, has carried on his generosity by committing all donations contributed by visitors at his funeral to the National Cancer Foundation, a sum worth, from what I last heard, approximately 30 grand.

During his lifetime, he was always a vivaciously jovial man and his court-jester antics never failed to crack us up. Even when his health teetered at the precipice of perilousness, he was still constantly a bundle of joy. His good-naturedness and honesty had won him more friends than foes, as evinced by his immense popularity among fellow Chinese Swimming Club(CSC) members during his active years. As an avid table-tennis and billiard player, as well as a Karaoke aficionado, he spent much of his senescent years honing his vocal skills at the lounge in CSC and at home. Not one to shy away from showcasing his talents, he always performed impromptu in public, to the delight of everyone present. Speaking of CSC, I will always remember the times he and my grandmother used to take me and my cousins to the club where we would spend the entire night in arcade games room while he would go to the karaoke lounge and billiard rooms to do his thing. Thereafter, he would always take us for supper at Xin Hai Shan located along Katong. What was schmaltziest, though, was the songs he repeatedly played on his car stereo and sang to everytime we sat in his car. The tunes of "Xin Tai Ruan", "Rong Shu Xia", "Ai Pia Jia Eh Yia" and "Ba Wo De Ai Qing Huan Gei Wo", inter alia, still reverberate in my head hithertho, and they poignantly remind me of the endearing grandfather that we all once physically had.

In 200, my grandfather was diagnosed with terminal illness, and within the next few years, the deterioration was swift, too swift. In 2005, he lost independence in mobility and was bounded to his custom-made electronic wheelchair ever since. No sooner, he sank into a state of perpetual hebetude and started losing the ability to do routine stuff like feeding himself, engaging in simple conversation et all, and had to be taken care of by my grandmother as well as a full-time nurse, auguring the worst to come. I always wondered, nonetheless, whether it was more mental rather than physical. It seemed to me that in recent years, he had lost the will to fight his ailment, to which he eventually succumbed. My grandmother has always occured to me as a figure of strength, and credits to her, she had been indefatigable while taking care of my grandfather during his twilight years. It was hence particularly heart-rending when, for the first time in my life, I saw her cry, nevermind with such pangs that one can only witness it for oneself to fully comprehend.

Whatever the vicissitudes of life, my grandfather had taken them all in his stride. In that light, he was truly remarkable. Illustrious personalities like Minister for Education Tharman Shanmugaratnam and Minister of the Prime Minister's Office Lim Boon Heng personally coming down to pay respects as well as the overflowing number of wreathes which made passers-by wonder whether the Botanic garden had relocated to 246 Telok Kurau Road were testament to his prominence. But even the most remarkable of people are only human, and as all homo sapiens would have been, he was enervated by the ravages of illness and embarked on a journey to the great beyond, leaving behind a legacy of 9 children and 25 grandchildren. On the final day of the funeral, which happened to be my birthday, my father's birthday and father's day, we made the final walk on foot to the chartered buses that would take us to Mundai crematorium for the cremation of his remains, the rite of passage to his afterlife. It turned out to be one of the most devastating scenes in my life when unbridled torrents of tears started flowing from everyone's faces as they muttered their final words while his coffin was being pushed into the incinerator.

Time is a wound healer, they say, and the pain of losing our grandfather would probably diminish with time as we move on with our respective lives, but while he may have left us in body, in spirit he will always linger. He built and left behind a beautiful family, a legacy, that will always remember him as the man we all looked up to as the personification of success, humility and impeccable character. So as I reminesce about the wonderful times I had with him during his lifetime, I embrace with pride and gratefulness my association-by-blood with the best grandfather I could ever possibly have had.

Dear grandpa, you may be physically gone forever, but you will continue to live on in our hearts and memories for all eternity. We love you.

Video courtesy of Charlyn: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=anmObQM4Ofg


5:41 PM - You left Gucci for Giordano, darling.

Thursday, June 07, 2007

Today was fucked up. I was supposed to go back at 3pm but ended up being held back till 5pm because of a meeting among all the specialists to discuss about issues that they weren't happy about in the squadron. Although it was claimed to be a very general, generic discussion session, it soon became patently obvious that the bull's eye was me. Everything eventually converged upon me, matter of fact, the agenda was set right from the start, and the agenda was me. They talked about me not doing certain stuff and not adhereing to certain standard operation procedures. In short, i was and errant member of the squadron. and they said that the higher qualifications a person has, the more outspoken he gets. Preposterous. What I did wasn't being outspoken, I merely asserted my stance, that of senior specialists who were supposed, let me stress again the word SUPPOSED, to lead by example, negotiate round and deviate from standard operating procedures themselves. How often have they "chao geng-ed" and we had to do their jobs for them and how often have they missed things out such that we have to clear their shit for them? It's come to a point where I don't see a point in putting anything more than what is required of me. So in retrospect, if my manning was from 9 - 11, i'll do 9-11.. no more, no less. Don't expect me to type reports for any of you or vet any of their reports cos i'm not having any. Anyway, I digressed. Back to the meeting, one particular indian master sergeant epitomised self-righteousness with nothing to show for. When she threw at me everything that she felt I did wrong, and claimed to do everything step by step and check over and over again to make sure she didnt forget anything, I just had to mention one thing that she blatently did not do on Saturday which i had kept under wraps hitherto and she had absolutely zilch defense for that. Her feeble response came in the form of why you so worked up and if there was anything that i did wrong why didn't you bring it up? yeah right. LMAO. we all know what happens when you put hierarchy and open reporting together. It's like trying to fire a cannon ball from a pistol, it's bound to backfire and at the end of the day, the one at the bottom of the hierarchy gets the shit for his "open reporting"-ness. It's no wonder god made shit come out from the asshole, and the only direction that shit travels is downwards. And I got really peeved throughout the whole session. Weird, but when I'm pissed off my face tends to go into mini spasms, making it hard to talk and express my point of view, not that being able to express my point of view in a completely normal situation was gonna serve any purpose, but still. Then there are some people who pretend to suck up to u on the quotidian basis but backstabs you when you least expected it. So she says that I should stop using the net but when someone of higher authority says that it's alright, she cowers back to her little corner and says nothing of it. In chinese they call that "Hu Jia Hu Wei", riding on the authority of others yet fearing it at the same time. Or rather, "Qi Shan Pa E". Totally no sense of assertion nor vindication as shown by her complete inaptness to assert her demands for me to not use the net with valid, justifiable reasons. And either she had been blind all these while, or she merely shitted her way through by saying she didn't know anyone else who used the net upon rebuttal from a 1st Sergeant. Because it's so absurdly visible that almost everyone does it, and no one denies it either. Well then, it concluded by saying that we should just forget all that had happened and start from now. yeah . sure. point taken. but what happened makes me wanna espouse the idea of open reporting by mailing every single fault i notice to every single person in the squadron. I preach an eye for an eye, so there you have it.
I don't respect people who do not practise what they preach, it only goes to show how lacking in credibility and abject failures their characters can be.


5:30 PM - You left Gucci for Giordano, darling.

about

Brandon T.

from Tao Nan, to Dunman High, to Temasek JC.
What's next? Cambridge the Lexus or NUS the Olive tree?
I love soccer, and life gets pretty interesting when you worship 11 men and love 1 woman.
And I'm still waiting..for you.

If you be my star I'll be your sky you can hide underneath me and come out at night I'll turn jet black and live in your shadows while you show off your light I live to let you shine

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This layout was done by nette, with the help of Brushes from 100X100 and the Codes from kriss.Finally, the lovely image was taken from: deviantart. Pls do not take out the credits.